2012 HILTON HEAD CAPER: January 2013

Friday 25 January 2013

Week 9 - Pepi "The Dog Walker" McNair

Week 9. Friday, January 18, 2013

This week the hunt is on for the elusive Stephanie "The Dog Walker" McNair. Pepi, a favorite pseudonym, is one of two known felons who call Hilton Head home. One of the guises she has donned in the past to escape detection is that of Executive and Design Assistant for McNair Builders. We suspect it is a front for money laundering but this has yet to be proven.

We know she is a graduate of the Ringling College of Art & Design in Sarasota, Florida so is well trained in sleight of hand and producing magic with brush and paint. This can be seen in her numerous depictions of landscapes and seascapes. She does not often shoot humans but can be seen furtively skirting the marches and the beaches in the company of what appear to be guard dogs. We must pool our resources and work together to apprehend her. Remember, life should be a circus, not a lot of fools running around being clowns.

Artist: Sandhya Manne

Artist: Wanda Rottenfusser

Artist: Kathleen Coy

Kim M. and Pamela

Kim M. - Artist: Kathleen Coy

Pamela- Artist: Maria Bennett Hock

Pamela - Artist: Kathleen Coy

Pamela - Artist: Lydia Jechorek

Saturday 19 January 2013

Week 8 - Pamela "The Godmother" Tadlock

Week 8 - Friday, January 11, 2013

This week an APB had gone out for Pamela “The Godmother” Tadlock. Pam (or Pammy P.I. as her gang affectionately calls her) is the head of a large and ruthless Florida crime family with ties to New York. We know she was seen in the company of Karin “Quickdraw” Jurick in New York in May 2010 and again in Hilton Head in the fall of 2012. What influence this had on her remains to be seen.

We do know her own gang continues to grow. Originally there were seven plus a partner-in-crime and a huge menagerie of animals but the current numbers are unknown. She still maintains a cover as an artist but we have seen no evidence of recent activity in that field. We suspect she is spending her time training her gang in far more nefarious activities but we have no proof. As a senior statesman and artist once said “This is one of those cases in which the imagination is baffled by the facts”. No matter the truth, she needs to be apprehended so keep working on those mugshots.

Artist: Sandhya Manne

Artist: Wanda Rottenfusser

Friday 11 January 2013

Week 7 - Kim "The Imposter" Maselli

Week 7. Friday, January 4, 2013.

We start off the New Year with Kim “The Imposter” Maselli. Kim masqueraded in Hilton Head as an aspiring figure painter eager to learn. In reality she spends her days tromping through the great outdoors (en plein air) with groups of impressionable acolytes convincing them that painting a tree or a pond is a noble pursuit. And worse, she makes them pay for the privilege by offering workshops such as “Yoga/Art Beach Retreat”. How much painting do you think will get done there?

You know she has nefarious connections as her work has been seen in many art magazines and she even claims to have written a book entitled “Painting North Carolina” (now conveniently sold out so we will never know what colour she wanted to paint it). Maselli purports to be a ‘regionally and nationally’ recognized artist. If that is true, she should be easy to apprehend. Dust off your brushes and prepare to paint.

Artist: Sandhya Manne

Artist: Wanda Rottenfusser

Artist: Lydia Jechorek

Artist: Maria Bennett Hock

Thursday 3 January 2013

Week 6 - Cindy "The Nurturer" Oneal

Week 6, Friday, December 14, 2012

Chicago, home of some of the most notorious gangsters of all time – Al Capone, Bugs Moran, John Dillinger. Home of speakeasies, gambling, prostitution, bootlegging and the St. Valentine’s Day Massacre. Also, home of Cindy “The Nurturer” Oneal. Coincidence? I think not!

Cindy is one of those most dastardly of criminals – one who dons the disguise of a health care professional and passes easily among us. But beware – she has access to our most vulnerable, most helpless and yes, most easily influenced – our babies. Often seen cuddling a new born and assuring a new Mom that everything will be alright she is fostering complete trust in the health care system. In Canada this might be viewed as benign, but in America – well, one never knows. Remember, cuddling can easily lead to being immortalized in paint. Would you trust your grandchild with this woman? I rest my case.